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Timing Can Be the Difference Between Helping or Hurting one Who is Grieving

Timing Can Be the Difference Between Helping or Hurting one Who is Grieving

Posted by on Sep 23, 2014 in Blog, Comfort, Grief Relief, Ministry

Timing can be the difference between helping or hurting a person who has just lost a loved one.

As I write this, our family is dealing with the loss of my wife, Crystal’s, father after a long battle with Parkinson’s Disease.  Most comments Crystal is getting from friends have been very comforting and encouraging during these difficult days of grieving.

One well-meaning friend, however, had poor timing with his comment.  He chose this time to bring up his theology about life after death to challenge our thinking.  His differing opinion could have really “taken the wind out of” our spirit had we not been secure in our own beliefs.  It was really the wrong time to bring up that subject, that way.

Indeed, people should be able to freely discuss differing opinions about the state of life after death.  However, when it can cause added disconcertion to the hearts of the bereaved, it is bad timing.


Towards Consideration;
David Knapp

    1 Comment

  1. Wow, those observations relaly resonate with me, Marla. When I think about the biggest losses of my own life, I realize it was always people outside of my immediate family who were the most help to me. Often, it was not even my closest friends, but just people who were acquaintences, casual friends or professionals (like nurses) who had the courage and insight to speak to me a word well placed. Often, it was just hearing these semi-strangers say simple things to me like You’ve suffered a terrible loss or I can hear the sadness in your voice that meant the most to me. Sometimes it seems that those closest to our pain can’t see it in sufficient focus to relaly, simply understand it.

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